So I finally got the Patron washed off my boobs.
After I tried for five minutes to hang my beer from the coat hanger in the bathroom , I have realized I am drunk
I just added her as a friend on Facebook. I met her 5 minutes ago and there are already more than 50 pics of me uploaded... from other nights.
He had to pee in the sink beside my head because the girl that I was taking care of was passed out on the toilet. To answer your question: yes i took a peek. Thats why we hooked up later.
i just did the math...im a product of my mothers birthday sex
I swear after i took it all i did was scream for four hours
Doing lines and watching a show on hot dogs around the world ... Why do I do this to myself
In that case, I'll try 2 find a date. But my options are AA friends or fuck buddies.
She's legally too young to drink and was making out with a guy who is ethically too old to drink.
I woke up with my wool blanket soaking wet on the dorm room floor, and my sweatshirt hanging on the shower door down the hall. So basically my camp-out-in-the-bathroom idea didn't turn out as planned
Why did I see a weird snapchat of you barking at McDonald's last night?
drinks after work?
that question mark offends me.
It's obvious you're hotter. You've been doing a married guy for almost 2 years.
You told me that you couldn't come over because you felt like you were gonna die and that houses eat you when you die, and my house couldn't eat you because your house would be jealous. That's when I knew to take the bowl away from you.
Was it a bad idea to have spent all of my tax return on coke?
Randomize
