why is it that everytime a half black man enters something boring, it suddenly becomes sexy to people? golf? the presidency?
I just had a girl text me from knoxville "come see me. we'll go for drinks and I can make you breakfast"
how do you like your eggs?
over tits
I think his parents are learning english from the phrases I shout during sex.
God damn him and his understanding ways and little hip muscle things.
He threw up the X he took like 30min before then when we thought his antics were over... BOOM! He tried to pee out a light he was holding.
Remember camping when you drank 36 beers to yourself in one day and puked in your tent? Ready for round 2?
Dude, I had no choice. I was defending my genitals.
Yea no bueno and I only brought enough weed to last one night. And it was no Hanukah nug, it didn't last 8 days.
I'm horny too so maybe we will both recap our regrets on Sunday
He doesn't deserve you. Your ass looks 8 times better than his face ever will. Wanna order pizza and watch porn?
well he never texted me back and the pizza I took my rage out didn't deserve such malice
Your babysitter texted, wants me to pay with weed. I don't know where to get any & don't want to. Will she take cigarettes instead? Or um, cash? Like a person?
Me and mom just bonded over our mutual desire to bang Mark Ruffalo. I'm not sure how to feel about this.
She made me baby bird juul smoke to her while we were fucking
not even sure this counts as hungover but like my body can't exist in reality today
Randomize
