I just figured it out. Meghan has the same smile as Sylvester Stallone.
Brickbreaker makes my post drinking poops that much better. Sorry, I had to tell someone who might agree.
he called to tell me the scratches were still on his back. this was in the summer.. still the best hookup
And now that i don't feel so bad because you're not pregnant the $15 for the pregnancy test I bought would be appreciated
You sucked the drug dealers dick for a 20 of coke...?
Nooo, I payed for that. I sucked his dick because I had an urge.
was just hit on by a homeless lesbian. forever alone.
Steve just broke his bong and some kid in an american flag bathing suit and no shirt just fell down the stairs. Its dangerous here
At one point, you closed your eyes and asked me which 'six flags' we were at
Ryan friended me on LinkedIn and it took everything in my power not to endorse him for sexual dysfunction as a skill.
I'm moving out of my place and I just gave my mom a couch that I had sex on last night. Reduce, reuse, recycle at its best.
I just lit a blunt like right in front of an old man and I was like sir please shieldeth your eyes
I'm going to need to invest in some knee pads if I keep having nights like tonight
If Dr Phil has taught me anything about myself, it’s that I can seriously relate to those women who fake their pregnancies.
The Domino's delivery guy is in front of me at The Wendy's drive-through. Hmmm.....
Nothing personal but yes I would be suspicious If I saw 3 guys and 2 girls in the same bathroom stall together
Randomize
