I have a very awkward question for you. Could you possibly take my black dildo. My mom wants to clean my room.
I can do anything tonight that doesnt involve an erection.
my whole body is tingling just thinking about the orgasm hes going to give me
cat food counts as protein by the way
Wait time out. Did I start last night with pants?
So can we talk about how we all three made out with the bike taxi driver in lieu of paying him. I'm not even mad, that's resourceful. You know what married girls would have had to do? They'd have had to pay.
In case you were wondering, taking me to see beauty and the beast in theaters would totally get you an unsolicited sloppy beej in the parking lot afterwards.
You should probably take note of that and make it happen.
Trust me. I don't get home before 5am. I know what Immmm doing. BTW bail money is in my closet. PEACE
That's what he gets for shittin at the strip club. Who does that??
I just sent a bad sext to my sister. There's not even a way to damage control this, is there?
Made my roommate send me tit pics so I could send them to someone because I didn't want to move.
Would you still love me if my nipple fell off?
Dude I'm so clean right now. Like I feel insulted that I can pass a piss test.
yeah I woke up in jail with two different shoes on and neither of them were mine
Who knew a blowjob could cause this kind of crazy
He wasn't prepared for it
Randomize
