My milkshake brings 85 to 90 percent of the boys to the yard
why does hillary duff have a greatest hits album?
The only way I made it through work was reminding myself how many margaritas per hour I was making
so the photographer said "let's get a picture of the cousins" so we posed together, and then he said " lets get a picture of the couples" So we posed together.
Just do let me go home with anyone especially I a guy with a hair sweater
His penis contains the glue that keeps this relationship together.
either I'm really high or that last bong rip tasted like christmas
Tomorrow's Mother's Day and the only thing I can afford is beer and the McDonalds dollar menu. Do you think a Budweiser and a Big Mac says thank you for me fucking up your life since 1990?
11/10 would buy him a McLobster
Apparently I had 2 bloody noses and after my sis put me to bed at the hotel, I escaped and my sister's friend found me in an elevator with some guy
He had the same tone in his voice and look in his eyes that he gets when he says UFOs aren't real.
Its like my group of friends and I are all dating and we're all just a bunch of Swingers, is that normal?
You set a couch on fire in my brothers backyard?
Just the cushions
Okay, let's just all take a step back and think about how funny this will seem in like a year... Maybe 2 if his nose is actually broken.
His sex game is strong it’s like a warlord’s dick! you know what I mean?
Nope
Randomize
