Does having sex in the men's bathroom on the boardwalk count as having sex on the beach?
I'm going to come in a little later this morning....there's no heterosexual way to say this....$1 flip flop sale at old navy
we sixty- nined on a tennis court.. not even drunk. you say insane. i say creative genius.
Did you push me into the oil wrestling or did I elect to do it?
You said you wanted to do it, but I gave you a friendly nudge.
A beer fell out of the case, hit the ground and started spraying. He's a pro. He grabbed it and shotgunned it while still holding the case.
I have just figured that it takes exactly 2 and a half rums to clean the bathroom..
It's been two days. I am still burping up jello. Everything tastes like jello. Everything smells like jello. I am DONE with jello shots.
I can only send "I want your dick" texts to so many guys before I accidentally over-book myself. I need a day planner.
Dude just texted me asking if I could drive 45 mins for a quickie dude use your hand
Did my married ex-boyfriend really tell me that he prays for me? Fucking Judas
Just reintroduced tequila back into my life...so that's happening
YAS SHES BACK AND BETTER THAN EVER
Remind me to tell you all about the topless girl on the street who attempted to taze me.
Someone left a middle school yearbook here. I recognized one kid from banging his mom last year.
I just wanna be euthanized
Thas it
Pinterest knows I’m getting divorced
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