I use a guy for sex and get three minutes out of him. go figure
The answer to your question is yes. I am wearing a star of david to the bar in order attract a jewish man.
you were mass sexting so we took your phone away
She deep throated me and when I woke up she made me pizza. I was full of emotions I started to cry.
everyone at work keeps looking at me like they know I got the herp this weekend
You were sitting in the tub, clothed, squirting my KY all over yourself. You said "it's warm." then passed out.
Dude I just ripped my new jeans climbing out the window so his booty call wouldn't realize I was home. Being his roommate should come with hazard pay
You straddled the banister and fell down the stairs, then proceeded to crawl back up them, I think you need to lay down
I'm surprised I didn't lose anything last night. Except maybe my dignity but other than that we gucci.
she asked me to come back to her house where "hopefully her kids were asleep". that my friend is what i call a dealbreaker
I'm giving random strangers at the bar sips of my fishbowl, then telling them I have Ebola. It's a fun night.
I don't have any soul left to be crushed.
he told me he liked me . I thought we were just fuck buddies . This ruins everything!
All that stuff they told us in middle school about drugs being easy to find was a bullshit lie.
Just stalked the girl I hooked up with last night's boyfriend. He seems nice, I approve.
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