new low, shannon just screamed FUCK THE IRISH to a 10 year old's face then proceeded to throw a hotdog at his parents. I think its time i take her home.
I feel like i made up for not being able to drink on St Pattys Day, Mardi Gras, and last years Cinco De Mayo. That hungover.
How did your new apartment party go last night?
I'm really happy i have a bigger bathroom to puke in.
Dude she threw his clothes out n 8th floor window and her dog tried to bite his dick off. So the answer is yes it could be worse...
After he called me a "spirited little girl" I realized that I need to stop sleeping with guys more than ten years older than me.
I just learned a new drink. Sloppy Ninja. Half Saki Half Nyquil
Welcome to the difference between being FWBs (remember how we used to see who could get more lap dances a night?) and being in a relationship. Fun, huh?
I JUST HAD A FLASH MEMORY OF DOING A SHOT OF WHISKEY WITH MY BEER YOU WERE SUPPOSED TO PUNCH ME IN THE FACE TO PREVENT THAT FROM HAPPENING.
I walked by the two of them and mouthed "fuck me" based on there reaction I think they just came in their pants
I think it would be reallllly cool if you took your best friend to work so she doesnt have to have an awkward cab ride with the driver she drunkenly made out with last night ...
He threw a twenty at the stripper and asked for change
well did he get it
....yes
If I die, let him know that his penis was the last penis I saw. And I'm happy about that.
I threw a dessert topping at a baby tonight so drink up! If you stay sober tonight I will be very disappointed in you.
My professor just asked for my number. Not fucking her till after finals though I learned my lesson last time.
Just checked out of walmart with a 30 pack of Budlight and a wiffle bat. Hello, Monday night.
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