lol whn u cming hre I nd 2 c ur fce
IF YOU TEXT ME ONE MORE SHORTENED VERSION OF A WORD, THE ONLY THING YOU'LL SEE IS MY FIST IN YOUR FACE.
they thought it would be fun to get out their yearbook and see who hooked up with the most guys..I won...I don't even go to the same school
worse things have happened to me. but if it will make you feel better you can pay for my therapist sessions next week.
What can I say, we hook up during the holidays.. We're a seasonal couple
currently shading my boobs to make it look like i have mass cleavage...thanks art school
She wants to have naked weekends
They call that free range vagina in France
You asked me to pick a color between pink and purple, and I said orange; you told me, "okay, that's a truth question". Then you asked if I had ever deep-throated a cupcake...I didn't even know what to say.
Dude, just found out there's a monster in a video game named after me. No more dating nerds.
I ate shrooms on a frozen river in an ice fishing shack after a day of vics and beer and walked around on the river in a stupor. They made me bite the head off of a fish.
I kinda got drunk and threw my debit card into a bonfire so I don't have any money at the moment lol.
Yeah you're weird. You once told me you would by me a house in the middle of sex. Like as you were thrusting.
Don't worry about us we're making Mac and cheese
MAC AND CHEESE ABORTED, WE HAD FIRE
Hey do u remember the time we used my mascara wand as a drink stirer?
And tell your penis that we can hang out tonight for sure.
If he moved really quickly from "hi I've had a crush on you for years" to "send nudes" you probably were used.
Randomize
