Yeah, it wasn't as bad as I thought. I tried not to clench and things went pretty smoothly.
last night was the icing on my 3 week vodka binge cake
I hope this doesn't become one of those friendships where we dont have sex
I just made doing the dishes into a drinking game. crafty, or pathetic?
Your dad needs a mid life crisis affair thing, I could totally be that girl.
just start off by saying "hey, i cockblocked my friend last night and need to make it up to him, could you help?"
Hickey on my chest, threw out my elbow and now walking out my shame.
Youre getting too old for this
Dude cabbage spilt on the floor, and now danielles rolling it. Happy st party's day.
And I might get them triple pierced after that
Damn, I didn't realize you'd declared war on airport metal detectors
I keep jumping up and down in front of the mirror naked. The only motivation I would be to stop and put clothes on is if you come over. Hurry.
All I know is that I woke up with my pajamas on inside out in front of a bowl of watered down kd. Sitting up. I didn't even make it to bed.
like stop just cause your whole life has been one enormous reject pile does not mean that i have to suffer too
GUESS WHO STILL HAS BOTH NIPPLES!
Straight up last night my mom was like josh you need to find a job that doesn't include the selling or transporting of drugs
That was the first time ive ever slept with a girl with a q in her name
Randomize
