I miss Bob Barker.
Yeah, more like Douche Carey...
all we need is a web designer
and a bunch of prostitutes
he keeps calling me but I'm too scared to answer... Not sure what he's gonna yell at me for: barging into his room while he was with another girl, filling her shoes with dog food and water, or hiding his keys in the garbage disposal.....
We convinced him to snort an altoid. We should not be allowed to drink together
I am at the point where deciding not to drink alone is worth a rocky music montage in and of itself.
All I kmoe is rheres a coffee pot full pf vodka in my purse
No, trust me. Falling down the stairs is a fucking sobering experience.
We're bowling witha frozen turkey in the hallway...ur missing out
They installed a lotion dispenser in the bathroom at work... its like they want me to masturbate on the clock...
Her desktop wallpaper is a collage of penises she fucked.
So after taking my shirt off, he pulls my bra off like a hockey jersey. FUCKIN PRO. Guy knew what he wanted.
she used her teeth again, but this time it was out of love
don't worry, i'm not mad. i'm just angry. and furious. and about to set your ass on fire.
Its almost 1 am and u wanna get together and cry naked
He's good looking but he really sounds like kermit the frog, can you imagine how fucking him would sound like?
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