Do you feel that fire radiating from matt's crotch for you
Gross. gingers suck
I woke up and she had breakfast in bed for me
RUN RUN RUN RUN
The weather is perfect in Seattle right now. Warm enough for girls to not wear bras, but cold enough for me to see them nipping out in the shade.
good call on bringing her. it's always good to invite chicks who mix booze and prescription drugs.
the fair has chocolate covered bacon...impossible is nothing.
He kept waking up periodically throughtout the night to bit my ear and pass back out.
Help. Me. He just whispered 'prepare yourself', & sprayed hairspray everywheres to make sure the 'air was crisp'
Trumps. I've been wiping my ass with fast food napkins for 3 days.
Bunch of Navy warships just sailed into New York Harbor for Fleet Week. Nobodys getting laid this weekend.
I was mid-sentence and you stopped me and said, "Yeah.. for my vaginas sake, I'm gonna need you to stop talking right now."
he had hair everywhere except his balls
I will find, mount, and marry that person.
As of right now, my vibrator and a bag of snickers share the same drawer
It’s gonna be hard being interviewed by this girl without remembering the time she showed me her nipple piercings at Dylan’s party
Sadly my Summer of Cocks is coming to an end
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