going to the gym drunk. fuck whoever made basketball season and getting a spring break ready body in the same season.
officially christened the dorm room by sucking my spilled drink off the floor. tastes like homee
You remember the guy that busted in waving a tazer at everyone yelling "get the fuck outta my crib"?
yeah you don't forget that shit easily
We ended up crawling out from our hiding spot and playing pool with him once he calmed down. His name is Marcus. I got his email.
I was barred out and drunk as fuck locked out at 3am in my Indian costume. It was literally freezing outside. I laid down on the concrete and made a bonfire with dry leaves. Then proceeded to ask.the.bonfire nicely to "please dont go out". Drunk me went strait up survival mode.
My mascara kind of smells like tequila to me...Is this my body crying for help or asking for a shot?
So that's all you want from me. Easy ass.
And an everlasting friendship
Yeah, I've been trying to get him to eat healthier. Turns out he'll eat almost any fruit or vegetable as long I let him eat it off my body.
There is no sno cone on earth better than alone naked time. Side note: text when you all are headed home.
Decided I'm going to wear a shirt that says "I'm sorry" whenever we go back to that fraternity
At what part of the night did you guys leave?
After my hot tub cannonball.
I wanna say I regret bonging a beer while having sex with Mike, but it helped me get thru it.
Spending the night with him made me realize that stupid people both irritate and fascinate me, so I'd say it equaled itself out.
I snuck out of his room and his roommate stopped me to tell me there was a condom stuck to my back
Let's FaceTime each other while we shotgun beers
My favorite bra is missing and I smell like beer and bad decisions. This is definitely a sign that hoe mode is activated.
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