Ducking stuck downtown...all the fuxkig roads are blixkded
I'm drive I can fine osifer
Never have I ever before welcomed her period with such enthusiasm. She was starting to pick out baby names. She got me "What to Expect When You're Expecting."
i've never heard her scream louder than when the koreans scored. what am i lacking in bed?
its like fishing. just send her some cock shots to keep her on the hook then use tequila to reel her in
Something about a hand job in a car doesn't scream girlfriend
im honestly just eating salsa and looking at his penis
Do you think a former stripper/heroin addict constitutes as a high risk sexual partner?
He dared me to drink a bottle of olive oil in exchange for a 30 pack... So much for loosing the freshman fifteen this year.
He bought me a oreo ice cream cake with "thanks for not calling the cops!" written in icing. If that doesn't sum up winter break, I don't know what does.
Bailing my boss from jail at five in the morning.. If thats not a promotion I don't what is.
Where are you? We're in between the guy dressed as a giant inflatable penis and the Justin Bieber lookalike lesbians
Does the penis have a genital wart?
I don't know if we can compare high school reunions anymore. The keg stands started before 7.
I remember the Prince Albert and the three penises in the threesome. But the rest no.
Don't get yourself off tomorrow. We. Are. Having. Sex. That's that. Just dont do it.
Randomize
