Have fun fixing the bed from last night Bob Villa.
At least you didn't call me Brittany this time
Could you imagine if a Skynet machine combination of Bob Ross and Chuck Norris were built? It would rule the universe with a soft spoken fan brush of kung fu dominance
It would be truly incredible. I hope we are blessed with this being in our lifetime.
we both passed out while playing beer pong, woke up in the morning and continued to play coffee pong to cure our hangovers
Ran into him today. He apologized via facebook. sometimes I hate our generation
just found my old 10th grade stash of beer in a shoebox. guess who's getting trashed tonight
Yea. You cant just squeeze my balls. They are sensitive
No, the weekend was great. It was the waking up in the pond in the raft without an oar that sucked. That fucking water is cold at 7am.
maybe these stereotypes wouldn't come up if you would stop taking body shots off another
There are cops on horseback in our back yard
Nothing says happy gameday like waking up in only an ACC Championship shirt in the qb's bed with a different football player
I think sneezing out coked up boogers onto your professor disqualifies you from the "I was sick" excuse
After last night, I think I need a service animal to monitor the life choices I make when I'm inebriated. A monkey, or a clever dog. Or a really assertive parrot.
Nothing like sitting at your midterm pissed at yourself because you put your graphing calculator batteries in your vibrator and forgot to put them back in before the exam 😑
Do not, I repeat, DO NOT uncuff him no matter how much he begs. He knows what he did.
And with the bitter taste of failure in my mouth, i am off to pub to drown it in tequila and 19 year olds, so in the morning i can add pregnancy and stds to my list of problems.
Randomize
