Awesome. Ask her out.
Nope. She's got a detail of ed hardy security around her.
yeah i like to chase my xanax with prozac and then viagra. you're up...and then you're UP
i woke up convinced that my room was backwards i tried to go into the closet to get outta my room
he told me he saved a turtle in the middle of the road.. i told him id be over in ten minutes...i mean he deserves a bj after that.
well isn't that the pot calling the kettle a make out whore
Why do I feel like the only way for this trip to end is alcohol poisoning?
If you fool around, take the WHITE sweatshirt off of her first. It's mine, and I don't like your cum nearly as much as she does.
I'm laying in the fetal position on the floor of my kitchen eating potato salad with my fingers. Please come over with some real food and keep me company.
It's just not a Friday night unless I'm getting propositioned by a guy in a wheelchair via Facebook messenger...
Jesus, I think this onesie was designed to keep me from masturbating.
For a guy who came before his dick was out of his pants, he gave surprisingly good head.
The irony of the fact that I'm going to be starting my period on Thanksgiving. Something to truly be thankful for.
Think of it as a business transaction. That's how I justify all the horrible things I do. Blow my married boss? Just a business transaction.
We banged in his car behind the burrito place. Google Maps keeps asking me to rate my visit. 5/5, would cum again.
Nice. Make him jerk off and tape it. Send it to his woman. I also love that you had another skype date
Randomize