i think the world will end when pigs can fly. think about it, everyone says blah blah when pigs fly. so shit would be going down if they ever can.
oh fuck your right
As my groomsman, I expect you to learn the Thriller dance with me before next September.
We just described beer as "big boy apple juice" to his 2 year old.
I was so high I thought there were pigeons in my room. Long story short there are now donut crumbs all around my bedroom.
bong water from a few floors above me just splashed onto my face when i was looking out the window. Happy 4/21 to me
He came up and told us to watch as he chugged his beer with no hands. Then asked if he could come drunk swimming with us.
Why does She think it's her duty to welcome in freshman through the welcome mat that is her vagina
STOP LICKING HIS MUSTACHE
Just living on dreams and a bed of used condoms
I walked into her room to find her sitting on the end of her bed with her heads in her hands talking to herself. She kept muttering things like "What? How? No. What? I don't --- How?" $10 says she's pregnant.
I'll see to your $10 and raise you $40.
Say what you want about my van, but I've got more action there than in my apartment. A body pillow and a joint still go a long way!
I renamed some of my contacts in my phone before passing out and I have one I cant figure out, its "fucking house elf scum"
*tries to be fun and flirty* *literally gets peed on*
WHAT IS ALL THIS WATER BOTTLE FLIPPING NONSENSE? WHAT IS LIT?
YOUTHS.
I offered to go down on her because of how impressive her theatre career was. Stop letting me talk to lesbians.
Randomize
