he just found out his girl is having a boy. he's probably googling "Ed Hardy diapers" as we speak.
my voice of reason is faarrr too drunk for me to listen.
I haven't had nearly enough lesbian experiences to fully commit to this relationship.
Step 1: drink. 2: drink more. 3: go for it. 4a: success. 4b: drink more. 5. drink. 6. go for other girls. 7. drink more. Sound good?
If you hear screaming in the middle of the night, bat got loose. Call poison control immediately and explain rabies
Check out this gay circle: I've now hooked up with my ex-boyfriend, my ex's ex-boyfriend, my ex's ex-boyfriend's ex-boyfriend, and most recently my ex's ex-boyfriend's ex-boyfriend's ex-fling.
I didn't just randomly come up with it. But if you want to give me extra credit for creativity I have a bare chest and chocolate sauce left
Daquari drive throughs 24 hours a day. LORD HAVE MERCY
I've noticed we have slowly begun to phase the "B" out of our Bromance.
My car has a permanent smell of sex to it now.
the hole that the tears left- fill it with pizza
He is currently passed out on his toilet. Point day drinking.
Ok sry I left that ambiguous......did you want contact solution or fellatio?
She was screaming and crying about how she couldn't find her middle finger. Then, she threw her body on to the pavement. Thats the last time we buy a freshmen a handle.
I went to steal condoms from your room and all I could find was chik fil a sauce
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