im doing shots everytime lil jon says it in the song shots....blackout town here i come
He seems like he has feelings, which is completely unacceptable; esp for a boy in college.
i finally found my car by the hideout. it was parked in an employee only parking space with a torn up piece of paper in the back window with the word employee scribbled on it.
its hard to take this fight seriously when one dude is an oompa loompa, and the other is a "g spot"
the cops who came hadnt heard yet. when we told them they sang the star spangled banner with us
Also, you tried to make me learn all of the presidents, in order, with a picture book as an aid. At 4 am. What the fuck?
I've woke up in his bed 4 out of the past 6 mornings. I feel like this might be the time to learn more about him then his first name and what kind of beer he drinks.
you were stumbling down richmond carrying a girl in a nurse costume. its not even halloween dude
you're good to come back. The bouncer pulled me aside and told me. He also said you have nothing to worry about and that you have an awesome "upper punch" or some shit
Would it be inappropriate to do a science fair project on whether the type of drunk a person is is determined by nature or nurture
dude you're not even a fucking science major
She told me I should be proud of my dick pics, then told me she was in love with me, then I dropped her off at her boyfriend's. I was a new kind of failure tonight.
And I must've sleep walked to the fridge cause when I woke up, there I was, balls deep in a fudge pop.
I feel like people expect me to always be a sarcastic, shade throwing drunk. And you know me, I hate to disappoint.
He said we had an hour long conversation about how awesome I was.
At some point i am going to say to you "i have this really bad idea! You in? " just go with it.
Randomize
