chicago's viagra triangle is not unlike the bermuda triangle in thatt things just get lost...... planes, ships, dignity, virginity, etc.
just woke up to two already rolled blunts and a full explanation of what happened last night. I love my gf
You then began crawling around in the grass with a magnifying class saying you were searching for the magic school bus.
Does anyone know who that girl who fell backwards and broke the shoe rack with her head was?
found glitter on my cock. thank you for bringing me to that dance recital.
you think that next time i come over to do this you can pick up the condom wrappers you used on the other girls
The best thing about my promotion is that I now have an office with a door. I can take my naps in peace instead of leaning my head against the stall in the bathroom.
I can't believe they pay you six figures. I hate you.
Ssssssssssshhhhhhhhhhhiiiiiiii!iiiiiiiiiitttttttttttttttssssssssssssshhhhhhhhooooooooowwwwwww. Letters for emphaSSIIISISEEEE!
I don't even see the point of going over to his place dressed anymore.
I hope you fall on your chin.
Jealousy makes you ugly.
I drunk dialed my ex-boyfriend last night. He was sitting next to my new boyfriend. Shoot me in the face.
I just closed two deals on my laptop from my bathroom while smoking a bowl, like a bawssss. Working from home is my favorite.
If you can't seal the deal with her, I will. And you know I'll be successful. So there's your incentive
was I atleast graceful when I feel down that flight of stairs and broke my hand?
Did you smoke and go to the aquarium again?
I drank Dr. Pepper and instant breakfast mix together and threw up sober for the first time.
Randomize
