imagine how many guys you'd have sex if you didn't recieve your monthly gift.
I just dont think you can meet a stranger after youve heard them cum through the walls though
You may or may not of thrown up on your shoes, and you tried to give me a wet willy in my eye.
I'm pretty sure that when my parents bought me those savings bonds they thought it would go towards something useful like tuition. Not your bail.
I told you I'd buy you lunch.
I was mixing candy canes and coors light and was in a great place.
You emptied out your taco and asked the lady for a refill...and then you continued to carry out a full conversation SCREAMING
Apparently it is impossible to get kicked out of taco bell....I'll try harder next time
I got pulled into the conversation by "she sleeps with everybody" then "she" involved sleeping with "cocks the size of a viva burrito"
He's in the hospital yelling at his brother to at least have stuck something "normal" up his ass.
Again?
You told me "I need to pound this drinks if I'm going to pretend his dick is big enough" then left. Dollar night quotes 2012
dude, you declined head because you wanted to tell her about how you put cinnamon in your weed. also, we're low on Chef Boyardee
We need to drink more. Just think how awesome it would be to wake up in a trailer and NOT remember how wee got here.
she had a dildo shaped like a dolphin. she will forever be known as Flipper
we were having a conversation about big dicks and the chick at the table beside us turned to us said "me and my boyfriend just broke up a few days ago. Could you please NOT talk about big dicks"
I REALLY NEED TO STOP CELEBRATING THAT FUCKING HOLIDAY
His sex game is strong it’s like a warlord’s dick! you know what I mean?
Nope
Randomize
