You also had the stripper slap the shit out of me for not having any money....remember that?
I looked up to you, until I saw her walk out of your room.
he likes ron paul.... that's all i'm going to say....
I didn't think I could chip a tooth while giving a blowjob until I met him.
I don't care. He smelled like a fucking chilli cookoff
My life has literally become a dickpocolypse. Thank you, summer, I missed you.
i've met an abundance of virgins and guys who where flip flops, i thinks there's a correlation
I don't care if he's straight, his cock will be in my mouth by midnight. Like a closeted Cinderella.
I've reached the point to where my pre-gaming needs to be limited to pre-inning-ing
Please. Last time I saw him I awkwardly pulled his rat tail until it got too weird
I feel like when purchasing hard liquor on a Monday I also need to buy a happy 21st bday card to not seem so pathetic
Im rolling face in a pizzeria. I want to be with people who love me.
He sent me a limp picture of his penis with the caption " same ol, same ol' I cant believe these are the type of guys I sleep with
You went over didnt you?
i need some food
Holy shit I forgot about you stabbing him.
I was the only one in group sessions to bring up sex as a stress reliever. Some of those people were awfully judgy despite the fact we were all in a psych ward.
Randomize
