I want to take you away to a place of dolphin rides and hot stone massages.
so when am I gonna get some from you?
when you dick grows 3 inches
I miss Michael Jackson so much sometimes
He didnt have condoms & didnt trust himself to pull out. Thats when I knew he was a keeper. So I blew him so he knew I was a keeper too.
True romance of the 21st century.
Is there a word for someone who only has sex with NFL prospects?
Where would I incorporate "your boyfriend fucked the shit out of me last night" before or after Merry Christmas bitch?
By the way, I'm pretty sure your husband is publicly advocating more BJs for my husband, via Facebook.
Just saw a tranny in a skimpy captain america costume walking around campus. Going to follow her. You gotta see this
They're showing aladdin at the bar my birthday is complete
Ill tap morse code on the ceiling when im ready for you to come down amd smoke
Not saying I'm a lesbian. Just saying that every time she walks by I wanna scissor her
YOU RAISED A SWORD OVER YOUR HEAD AND SCREAMED AT HIM WHAT THE FUCK ELSE DID YOU THINK WOULD HAPPEN?!
I'm going to confession for the first time in 6 years. Where do I start, the gay sex or rampant alcoholism?
We’ve discussed sex and dinner. Like chicken nuggets while doing it doggie and watching tv.
we started drinking at 4pm, somehows its 1 am im in bathing suit running from the cops.....any explanation of what happened?
Randomize
