I swear if I see one more guy in a v-neck and fedora I'm going to punch someone in the balls. This is philly, you're not supposed to look like Ryan Cabrera
IM INA KID IN KING ATURHTS CUNT!
A Kid In King Arthur's Court? Like the movie?
CUNT. CUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUNT
I jsut got pulled over and passed the sobritaty test.
Good thing spelling doesn't count.
she complimented my bra when we were hooking up. this lesbian thing has its upsides
We are winners. And by winners I mean home wrecking sluts
Isn't that what our 20s r for?? Testing the strength of other people's shitty relationships?
Inquiring minds want to know if your Bf is circumcised
She suggested that I come visit her in Europe and hook up with the heteroflexible Korean who sits next to her in class. Polylove is the best love.
That's all? I'm a pro at gay chicken. I'll touch his dick, I have no problem with that.
You took off all your clothes to try on her fur coat and then punched me when I said you couldn't wear it to bed.
I may have just made our entire microwave glow green. Like big green. Like spark and make me shit green.
Like worse than the time I blew up the microwave with the egg green.
She wouldn't eat a clam- if you blow a line pregnant you can eat a clam
Happy anniversary, did you sign and mail in the divorce papers yet?
there is partying, then there is whatever we did last night.
i cant hook up i'm covered in egg rolls
I'm sorry about the fire. I was too fucked up to do science, apparently.
Randomize
