I'm drinking ghetto ass mojitos!
Wow. How can mojitos be ghetto?
Squirt + bacardi limon + limes = ghetto mojitos
ok 1 i realized people actually live in central wisconsin and 2 culvers could be a good place to pick up chicks today
We just saw a waitress walk by with a tray of bacardi and whipped cream.
Whoever ordered that deserves a pat on the back and the "classiest customer" award
Is there a nice way of saying 'touch my penis or i dont really wanna hangout"?
He just told me he's been drinking vodka at work all day. I'm starting to believe in soul mates.
I almost got away with it until she smelled beer on the stroller.
Its like a zucchini between his legs. An orgasmic zucchini.
We sent off fireworks off in the taco bell drive through. They're taking it way too seriously.
When you say shenanigans does that mean I should bring birth control?
There is a severe lack of banging on that itinerary... I'd like a revision on my desk within the hour
I just want to make out with him forever
I found a used condom and a hairbrush in my dryer this morning.
Hiring someone to do your laundry would be a good investment.
she went outside...danced, got some snow, and put cherry vodka in it. she was so proud of herself.
Seriously though, I walked in and he was holding my cat in the air singing "the circle of life"...
I just bartered a blowjob for the ex-fiancée's engagement ring. FTW!
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