i wonder what thom yorke's orgasms sound like
She offered to make me a fruit roll up salad for breakfast...I'm not sure if that's the coolest or weirdest thing ever...
I wasn't on board with that statement until "home made dinosaurs"
you just kept bragging about how there was a "pretty large" chance that you had pooped on the same toilet as George Clooney
Tequila shots with cinnamon and orange write it down before I forget
i was laying in her brothers bed, in his old room. and i kept getting the chills. i didn't know if it was a draft or the ghosts of BJ's past.
Getting up is taking longer than anticipated. Alcoholic fish bowls have made getting out of bed a multitstep process.
im breathing rainbows and everyone is talking in bubbles whatever you gave me give me more
I heard him crying and I heard him listening to porn... I'm hoping to God they weren't at the same time.
We watched game of thrones, broke up and I drove away blasting ridin solo while he dougied
Is it normal that every guy I hook up with tells me my hair is sexy as it's happening? Like that can't be normal
He started a convo with me by saying that we went to high school together and then recommended I try meth.
My mom just said she had more presents to wrap, so I should "smoke some weed & go back to bed"... She really is Santa Claus
he's not even weird he's been offering me different drinks all night
oh i remember now hes the guy that liked when i peed on him
Saw a thong on the yellow lines of the street when I left this morning, are they yours by any chance?
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