I just had to sit down with an 11 year old who threatened to dick slap a girl.
I just threw up on my dentist
This is how scared I get when I ride roller coasters. And how scared I was when I had to poop when I had herpes.
.....so he has a son. Josh. That is not his roommate
you woke up, pulled a beer bottle out of your pants..took a drink and went back to sleep.
he yelled 'rock me amadeus!' when he came
i love that song!
NOT THE POINT
Her brother is deaf.
no wonder she was so good with her hands
and by clear my head i mean get drunk and cry myself into oblivion.
Just had to buy plan b w/ my robotic baby from family living.. Awkward.
Whats proper etiquette for apologizing to your wife for being so drunk you stood up and pissed on the bedroom floor next to the bed?
PUT DOWN THE JOINT AND STEP AWAY FROM THE TRUSTAFARIAN
HOW DID I LET MYSELF GET SUCKED IN HE HAS A PENIS FOR PETE'S SAKE.
I may be a complete scumbag but even im not willing to spend a grand and sit on a plane for 24 hours just for shrooms and a blowjob
You start to question your morals when you wake up at 430 and there's three people naked...that you don't no
cant one of your roommates drive you?
You came in my eye once. You owe me.
ill be there in 20
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