hdsncx Gizmo asnqw toilet blanasdi
ok, stay where you are, be there soon
That bitch is like a bad destiny's child song.
arkansas has a gas station called kum and go....story of my life
Today I ate a sandwich and half my molar fell off, feels like a semi sprayed into my jaw.
I wish i was spraying into your jaw.
using my metrocard to split lines. it says optimism on the back. i am optimistic that you will appear at my door and help me finish all these drugs.
I am growing concerned with the number of people here in cowboy hats
Just threw up. It looks like I may have swallowed a cigarette.
Her fucking playlist had randy newman on it. It was like woody was watching the whole time.
It's 4 am here and I just vomited myself awake....Not rising OR shining any time soon
So, my love of dick may have landed me in a cult. On the bright side, I now have a discount at Spencer's.
He wants another date...I mean he's cute, but I just am not ready to give up my glamorous single-girl lifestyle here.
you mean the one where you drink out of the carton and don't wear pants?
Yeah, and pee with the door open. It's the little things.
Woke up at my x's house. He said I talked about how much I love panda's for fourty five minutes. Then made him watch The Little Mermaid with me. Made the walk of shame infront of his mom. Things can only really go up from here.
Wait till you get home.
you were huddled over the toilet, throwing up, and every few seconds you'd look up and say "this is such a waste of vodka" then put your head back down and start puking again
I just balanced a full glass of chocolate milk on my left boob. Don't think i've ever been more proud.
Damn, I just did coke with a dude in a bathroom and after he took his dick out right in front of me and took a piss. What a power move.
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