He seemed more like the type to get donkey punched by a she-male hooker to me
I'll forget this but out at 4am with a lesbian model at lil waynes bday party for the record
We just took shots out of seashells. Welcome spring break 10.
i've decided that sluts are like cars. they may look good as hell on the outside, but you never know what kind of shit is hiding under the hood.
At least drunk you showered before switching sex partners last night.
dude chill. we stole 18 hamburgers from her house
no. you cant fuck a burger.
just tried to puke while my RA was trying to puke in the stall next to me.bonded for life
I'm still not completely convinced I'm not pregnant. I just dipped beef jerky in cream cheese frosting.
please visit steve this weekend, he is getting mature and responsible and shit which scares me.
The only alcohol in the house was a bottle of Sherry. It's like cough syrup that I shotgunned off Strawberry Shortcake's ass.
Prop 8 repealed and I FINALLY got my period. Good day for America!!!
I'm sitting at dinner with my family looking over sexts. The thirst is far too real. They're talking about retail and I'm like haha, yes, you are all correct.
He used the term 'cock-staggering' in an email. So needless to say things are going pretty well.
Yiu ever laugh so hard you stop breathing? Turns out weed -can- kill you.
I'm tryna think of an appropriate time to say "when I suck other dicks they seem like training dicks compared to yours" but I really can't think of a good way to say that
Randomize
