I am far too drunk to be making a tuna melt . There's blood EVERYWHERE.
There is a limo involved. Man up, and make yourself puke. Its only one more night of blacking out.
I don't know which part of you thought this was funny but it's fucked up to wake up in that much fluff and now we don't have a couch. Fuck you.
HOLY FUCK I JUST GOT WOKEN UP BY THUNDER!!!!!
I THINK I SHARTED
That's the saddest description of touching yourself I've heard since someone said "I was just lazily rubbing my clitoris while eating Cheetos alone"
THEY HAVE VIAGRA FLAVORED GELATO
RA just said I set the all time record for a student who lost houseing..30min..I was moveing out while my new roomate was moveing in. know of any off campous places to stay??
Gotta get new sheets. ..I fucked the satin off mine.
He peed off the roof and then we bonded it was beautiful
this night just went from meh to biblical thanks to drunk naked yahtzee
PUT DOWN THE JOINT AND STEP AWAY FROM THE TRUSTAFARIAN
Please don't fuck the professor. We both know that won't end well.
Had sex outside for the third time last night. Mosquito bites all over my ass, and i think i have a rash on my nipples. When will i learn.
Just wait till winter
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Dad literally changed the channel from an episode of Big Bang Theory to another episode of Big Bang Theory. That's why I hate this show.
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