after giving me morning oral, he left saying "hate to eat and run but..." oh yeah, he's getting a second date.
She was sleeping without a shirt so I thought I wouldI sneaked a peek at her nipples..than I realized they were just warts...on her back.
No, I was feeling sad because all of the other girls were like model-skinny. But then I remembered that I had big boobs and went to hit on their boyfriends.
when I woke up I found a half-eaten cherry toaster strudel sandwich with bacon in the middle.
dont get mad but guess who just got banned for life from dodger stadium
I just had my first experience getting hit on by a guy. It was really awkward, he touched my chest and invited me to a gay bar because "women get drunk and let their guard down at gay bars"
thats actually pretty good logic
Just wana tell you im wearing assless jorts tonight. Ive been waiting my whole life for this.
Not a clue. But I did find out that his penis has a British accent.
She carried my bag of puke down the aisle and the flight attendant wouldn't move the beverage cart so she put the puke bag in the flight attendant's face and said "I have a bag of sickness!" I've never seen a cart move that fast.
Cooked breakfast with his mom this morning...I'm like the housewife of one night stands
I woke up half naked on the floor next to his bed, and his cat was staring at me like it had seen everything that i myself don't remember..
If she's over 40, she won't believe you if you say " I'm only going to put the head in"
LMAO. Stop. Men are such gentleman these days. I woke up with no one beside me and you got 6 cents
6 cents and no orgasm 💃🏻🎉
We are so blessed
Everyone needs to leave the house so I can use the good vibrator without being judged.
she's 6'2. you bet your ass i slept with her.
Randomize
