It doesn't matter if they shave you or not, you're still susceptible to the staph infection.
a man that wears gold spandex underwear and party boys other people is a man after my own heart.
i want to have as much fun as i did last weekend. but plus the condom and minus the fear.
There is a girl in bio drinking beer out of a starbucks cup with a straw
I woke up laying in alphagetti with the message "I'd go get checked asap" written out in the letters.
He just stabbed two olives and a pickle with a fork and deep throated it in front of my family
Not even marginally surprised
We were sitting in my backseat and he just kept biting me and telling me we weren't at the zoo...
MASS TEXT: who ever dared Todd to suck on the Clorox wipes last night.. good goin jackass. you can come visit him, hes in room 266, AFTER hes done getting his stomach pumped.
HE DARED ME TO DARE HIM... DONT PUT THAT ON ME.
Asking him not to sleep with other girls is like asking me not to have my period apparently
Ok now I cleared out half the bar and Em and I have 5 Jameson shots lined up for you. You have 15 min.
You kept trying to use my cat as a napkin.
Can't a woman sleep on the floor in her own apartment in peace without being judged?
For real, I've been ditched by my boyfriend twice today alone. I fucking shaved for this guy.
Somewhere out there, Gloria Steinem just started to cry.
Wellp yesterday was spent absurdly hungover and today was spent in planned parenthood so I hope that's not an indication of the year to come
I walked in..crop dusted the whole place then asked her if she wanted to go to a place that smells better.
You were always a thinker
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