More tranny stories later!
The good thing about walking home in a dress on sunday morning is that people mistake my walk of shame as a walk to God.
Used tampon in my purse. That from you?
I saw a seagull swallow a hot-dog whole today, it reminded me of you.
I like yr title more along "the hot Russian I have sex with."
Well if all fails we can always become surrogate mothers. I hear that pays well.
There was an ice luge. Lets just leave it at that.
somedays, I wish the drugs you give me would convince me they were a bad idea preingestion.
where's the fun in that?
A homeless man just asked me if I had seen any "nekkid chicks with heineken bottles run by"
Berkeley was the right choice
Why the hell did you invite him? He's gonna bring two more inches of dick and zero fun.
I think there is a legit party going on the place we thought was AA
Sorry for face planting onto the table with all our alcohol on it
Listen, you can either give me drugs or an orgasm. You decide.
we found her. shes in the bathtub full of raw pasta. i dont even know...
On cleanup... i've counted 94 solo cups so far.. oh, and i found a miniature top hat in the microwave
Randomize
