You're in luck. The brownies don't even have butter, just vege oil
It was unlikely that the relationship was going to end with anything other than antibiotics.
I just realized last night I drunk-bought a flight to Florida for this weekend...kinda torn between the price and the potential of awesomeness
So... i mean if they do have cameras in his apartment buildings pool room atleast we gave them a little show.
you know u lost to a carboard cut out of sammy sosa in beer pong last night.
I think we should bring back the casual nipple tassel
my boss just offered me his leftover salvia im not sure if it was a trick question
He kept telling me Te Amo last night. Over and over. And that he was scared. Drunkenly. In Spanish.
It's not above me to sleep with him solely for his authentic budweiser shirt
I'm a great relationship counselor. My vagina will let you know if your relationship is gonna work or not.
Seriously, why do I have a mortar round?
My roommate just threatened to kill me with my own pan. Can I ever get away from the crazies?!
I should probably eat a Plan B. Pill for breakfast. Happy Halloween.
Its 7am I'm awake still drunk, there is food, random clothing and road cone in my room. I can't decide if this is a failure or a success???
His bedroom is the preferred destination of MILFs, cougars, recent divorcees and sexually frustrated wives
His penis is my hero
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