i just googled "what is oprah really like?" how do YOU think my night is going?
It was like my butthole was peeing. Felt comforting yet not fulfilling.
Have you not heard of Jennifer's supreme lust for William Shatner? She wants to eat Taco Bell off of his love handles
how do flat chested girls get laid?
Hey on the reals though tomorrow if i take you out to lunch as just a friend will you also suck my cock as just a friend?
She told me that when she orgasms she just lays there like that baby from teenmom. Who the fuck says that
i hope youre ready for a shit show because we just ordered a whole pitcher of red headed sluts
I'm drunk at a gay bar with my riding crop. God save the queens
But mostly fuck him senseless. Render him speechless. Have him look at my vagina and wonder, "WHAT SORCERY IS THIS?!"
Note to self: Don't go home with a recent divorcee. Semen and tears.
PA to anyone at the party last night and wondering where your pants are: they are in my backyard.
You can't Tinder AND have him bring you icecream in the same night. It messes with your vagina.
Come on kid, foreplay is elementary stuff. It's a vagina, not a sphinx.
Why were you twerking to, "The Wheels on the Bus"?
See I insist I'm not a groupie and then I say things like "will bang for a backstage pass".
Randomize
