What drug did you take that made the cabinets scream at you?
I walked into the bathroom and the toilet was on fire... I stood there for like a minute trying to decide whether I should put it out or get my camera.
I just took boredom to a whole new level. I just auto-tuned and remixed today's western civ lecture
her name was charlotte except you kept calling her chatroulette and yelling at her to show you her boobs
you handed the cop a condom last night and said "it's all about protect and serve right?"
And it looks like I sent you 4 failed attempts at the word "hey." Sorry about that.
Did you not learn anything for "HERPES SCARE 2010".........
Sarah likes to play this game where she leaves her thongs at every party. she hides them where hopefully gf's will find them. I caught her naked from the waste down in my freezer this morning
Does it count if I'm only ambidextrous while masturbating?
Are you coming to class or was the dick pic this morning your way of saying not today?
Just got cockblocked by my GF's wedding shower... That's a first. And I have to buy a gift.
I think my favorite day of the week is the day we get to fuck
He legit watched "Cops" the entire time he was fingering me.
The usual, icing my vag with a chimichanga.
I didn’t want to see that boob. I told her not to show me but she said “no, I’m going to show you”
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