they need to just BURY HIM!
Picking up third year law school girls is like MILF hunting for beginners
you opened the fridge, pissed on the food, fell over, then threw up on yourself. thats whats all over the kitchen.
All i learned in high school was how to sell drugs
I woke up at 2 pm to my roommate checking my pulse.
I made him drop me off at the wrong house waited for him to leave and crawled through several fences so he couldnt stalk me. How was your night?
I'm not embarrassed about the lap dance. I'm embarrassed for the singing during.
Omg. I felt like a crazed animal last night. My lesbian instincts burned a hole in my panties.
Dude.. full face helmets and hangovers do not mix... I am never going to get rid of the smell of puke.
You definitely in your drunken state were really concerned you would forget to buy milk today
Today is going to be the longest game of "was that a fart, or do I need to go wipe?" I have ever played. Maybe the most challenging too.
honestly my period and I are just as surprised to see each other every month
in a meeting in my bathtub while predrinkin for tonight. technology.
Everyone got an underage but her
How'd she get out of it?!
She hid in the FUCKING DRYER
But yeah, I am thinking that "Cake Heresy" will now be a thing
Randomize
