stupid gm bankruptcy made me miss the showcase showdown
Those cock suckers. We need to know who's winning the hot tub and the vacation to the alps
I saw a penis in my cereal this morning. do you think my cheerios are like professor trelawney's tea leaves?
one can only hope.
Let's get back to talking about you giving me a blow job.
i'm moving back early just in case the freshmen need a tour of the school
oh right the one that ends on your bed
Walked into the bar with my burrito and ordered a round of shots for everyone. Not sure if I want to look at the credit card statement.
Just wanna let u know that we are almost on the pity blow job level of our friendship.
I found a ladder. I don't know where I am. Gonna climb it. I feel like aladin
There comes a time where you just have to sit back and watch the drunken idiots pee on each other
I know you're on vacation but you should know I just walk of shamed through a hotel lobby while leaving a threesome on Friday the 13th. Fuck superstition, I win.
Have the decency to NOT HANG YOU'RE USED CONDOM ON THE FOOSEBALL HANDLES! Dickhead.
id one day like to live in a world full of emotionless and wonderfully fullfilling sex...
He's wearing my bra and eating a breadstick while jumping on our bed.....
I spent most of the stoned conversation with my dad proving to him that the Newfoundland is an actual dog and NOT a Snuffaluffagus-esque figment of my stoned imagination, while laughing over the fact there is actually a place caller Dildo, Canada. Have YOU taken time to be a good dad today?
I decided not to look up the nudes, because I believe that there is a line, and that mocking my old classmate's horrid nudes alone crosses that line.
No kiss but I got free McDonald's so at least we can focus on what is really important here
Randomize
