Came home to a chalk baord that read:" Think like a rapist." Can't say I'm surpirsed.
I cant video chat with you tonight, my parents are home
r u implying that im some kind of v-chat prostitution whore?
Wish I didn't live with 3 girls so I could beat off in peace.
i got a mint flavored condom from wellness day...im kind of tempted to taste it
I woke up pulling sunflower seeds out of my vagina. That kind of night.
All the girls at the party had American flag thongs on... Pretty impressed with coordination seeing as how impromptu this event was
I'm making you a bingo card for hookups of the school year 2011-12 so you can make even worse life decisions next year
i like feelif swiord YOU ARE A GOD
Well be careful man. Be careful. Wear shoes in the house. Safety. Safety first, then teamwork.
Just got our of the shower. I'm standing naked in front of my open windows cause fuck my neighbors that's why
If you were more comfortable around gay men, then you too could get wasted at the gay dance club and go home with hot girls.
I thought it was pretty weird, but after the marinating loins thing, i figured i'd roll with it.
And my parents said I crawled through the house
And remember people can't hear you kick ass in space
Got electrocuted a second ago, is it weird that I have a boner?
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