You just kept taking about baking cornbread and doing your physics. Even drunk assed random you is a better student than me.
Just a smidgen more estrogen and shed be golden
She's got a legit dose of dude going on
No kidding. All she needs is a cheek full of chewing tobacco and I'd have fucked John wayne.
I feel like somebody took my brain out. Stomped on it with cleats. And then put it back together with a glue stick. Thank you.
Nobody is stopping the marines from drinking in class on veterans day. They literally brought a cooler with a bottle of whiskey and vodka on ice. And are passing out red cups to anyone interested. Staying in Vegas for college has officialy become an A+ decision
i'm half naked talking to a cat. you don't have to justify your life to me.
Every time I drink before 5 somebody's pet dies
Stop drinking before 5
Easier said than done
this celing is unfamiliar to me... im just vaguely wondering where i am. but not quite concerned enough to do anything about it.
Is it really bad that my last patient offered to fuck my brains out if I gave her IV morphine...and I gave her my phone number and told her when my shift is over?
Let's get drunk and put things on the grill that have no right to be there.
Happy birthday, America.
He went down on me to the national anthem being sung by Jordan sparks. It was very patriotic of him
Also day 6: dick is healed and ready to go back to work.
Just witnessed some guy throw his fake eye at his dad's face. Actually, he whipped it at him.
Is it bad that I tried to build an outfit based around "What do people who use condoms look like when they buy condoms?"
Hurricane Harvey ruined my dick appt. WTF?!
If I could eat my chicken parm naked, it would be the closest I could ever be to God.
Randomize
