So its not gay if you have sex with another woman and its academic
so what if I'm having sex with a woman for recreation?
Thats gay
So, someone in Olympia stole my credit card # last week and bought a platypus vibrator with it. That’s it.
Words of Wisdom: ordering a pitcher of whiskey cokes, putting a straw in it, and calling it your drink is not socially acceptable
i totally forgot about the coupon that said i would show him how i pleasure myself.
he just made me youtube cheetahs running and he thinks he is in a pool
full cup flip cup was not exactly the reason I wanted to tell the cops when I was sleeping on the curb
Shit. We're going to have to drink until they're cute
Hello cirrhosis
I wanna give a stern lecture to whoever invented pants cause they are hard right now
When I woke up everyone at the party was in their underwear. Only you guys were playing strip pong.
Yes, we all have the power to convince a large amount of people to take their clothes off
Just seen a chubby version of you. Nearly kidnapped her. Perfect woman
Some guy Just sang about my ass on the street
It was terrible lyrics but I would have thrown my life savings into that guitar case if I had any.
Reasonably certain my seventh grade teacher is encouraging me to drop acid on twitter
He kept telling me that it stood for Sex Utility Vehicle
I would have rather been getting my vagina slowly waxed all day then be here.
I cam home to find him twitching on the floor, surrounded by unopened condoms and covered in cranberry sauce (yes I tasted it) while Thundercats was playing.
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