READY
for what?
TO HAVE SEXXXX
i think you have the wrong number
how do you have sooo much energy?
billy mays threw in a lil somethin extra when i ordered some oxiclean last week
Hulk Hogan has now convinced 2 women to marry him & I have yet to have a successful or healthy relationship. I am officially depressed.
At this point, I really just need a sign in sheet for my vagina.
I had to rush to my room and get my vibrator off my bed i didn't want him to know how long it's been since I had a decent fuck.
I guess it was to be expected that I was put on somebody's list called penis socket.
can anyone on this campus do anything sober?
Seriously, I look like I crawled out of a bog. Succeeding at being as undateable as possible.
I gave him a bunch of ideas to use to spice up their sex life. Say what you will, I am the best 'other' woman ever!
Look. When I let you cum on my tits don't fuck it all up by going "SKEET SKEET SKEET" it just pisses me off.
Because 9 pm Thursday you drink a loco cause you just wanna get drunk and have a good time with your friends. Then you wake up on Tuesday and you've had 17 locos and you're pregnant, lying on the side of the road, 3 states over. THAT'S why we don't have only locos parties.
Woke up with a $50 attached to my penis with a rubber band..
Sweet. Tell little Richard to buy us a sack and a pizza.
Dude i'm still drunk and i'm feeding a raccoon cereal from my bedroom window
I mean, she's batshit insane and once choked a guy with one hand but she's still MILF material in my book.
It's so weird fucking this kids aunt then going to the gym with him everyday, but my sick minded self loves it.
Randomize
