My mom foundout about my dui nd just called me to come home. I just took acid like 30 min ago. Wht should i do?
They should make a Rosetta Stone that allows men to understand what the fuck women are actually trying to say.
She said she never had to courage to go fully shaved. Since when did shaving your snatch become courageous?
she read insantiy as in-nast-tit-ty and asked what the hell does that mean...
Remember my theory about how the universe perfectly unfolds to fuck me? Well, it's at work right now
If I don't have carpet burn in the morning you aren't trying hard enough.
Im otw to class. I was at the Library. Just past three girls with a bottle of tequila playing dizzy bat.
I'm giving you a get out of sober free card for one of the nights
Like do you hear me I PUKED IN MY OWN HANDS AND HE STILL SAID I WAS GORGEOUS
the tv said "its small, its comfortable..." and i started laughing... safe to say he lost any dignity he had left...
It feels like one of my ribs evaporated.
He got up when I started trying to balance my wine glass on his head.
You're talking about alcohol when the smell of hand sanitizer is too much for me right now
I just put vodka in my apple sauce. Spice up your fucking life.
No, and she still hasn't answered me...I get a whole series of text messages about Guatemalan anal bleaching but no fucking answer to my question.
Randomize
