Really? You have stories that rival having a threesome with the two best friends of the guy your kinda seeing? Thats impressive.
sometimes I think that if I just met him. he would have a crazy realization and fall madly in love with me. what do you say? I'm not just another fan.
I'm on page 4.
Im on beer infinity
so i was dancing to the glee soundtrack with highheels. i tripped. and the dildo fell on my face. i dont know what happened.
Slutapocalypse this thursday. Invite every freshieee you hooked up with this semester to my house. Think of it like a meet n greet for them and battle of the sluts for us.
Is it horrible that I want to keep my purple landing strip until after my gyno apt? I feel like someone beside myself should see it...
I doubt were getting our security deposit back... the toilet just fell off the wall
Lmao the neighbor heard yall last night She wanted me to tell you way to finish strong
Slutty costumes are my most sacred holiday tradition! Wearing a not-slutty costume is like putting cheezwiz on a communion wafer.
Okay: Whipped cream, vodka, and a trampoline. This will either be really great, or really tragic.
Can one of you do me a favor? Light a match and throw it into my room. Bc I'm certain I would rather be burned to death than live in this hell I call my life
Bro, did you watch that scooby doo porn I sent to you?
Here's the thing, you got road head in two different cars tonight. You feel lucky yet?
You were so calm and collected as you strolled out the door with 40 mcdonalds cups in your arms. It was legendary.
I knew it was you who came home last night because no one else would walk in at 3 am and start microwaving a burrito
Randomize
