Afterall, it is the real San Francisco treat
the snow is so cold on my vagina.
why do you have snow on your vagina?
vodka and heels.
States back in the final four. Now our sunday night drinking has purpose. Sparty on baby.
You three are like the Bermuda Triangle for morals.
Fair warning: We've transformed the living room into a giant tent.
He told me he was in a Proactive commercial. It didn't seem to work for him but he was buying me shots so I slept with him anyways.
I'm so glad I got to use the word gutterslut before 11:00a today.
We really have to stop convincing people tazing is the cool thing to do.
I can feel my teeth in 4 dimensions. I shouldnt be this high at 8 in the morning.
Well I smoked some weird shit and I think I peed on my phone.
Just walked by the barren window naked in a family neighborhood. Who needs dignity.
Day one of being single and I've came three times. I can get used to this.
Last time we had sex i was dressed like a ninja turtle and someone else was in our bed, so this time should be fine.
I hope ur kiddin
wish i was
I may have been bent over an elementary school lunch table a few weeks ago. Don't judge.
Plus he probably didn't want to be at home, alone... Jacking off on the big screen without you there to lend a helping hand. I mean, let's be honest. It's not fun if it's not a little weird.
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