Nothin says happy bday jesus like a shot with your loved ones.
You brought out the iron board layed it on the ground in the middle of everyone and passed out for the night
Who just wakes up in their own bed and assumes "I probably blew some guy last night"
Just finished off a roll of paper towels. Celebration blunt?
I don't understand but I'll be there in 5
Dude, its flawless. what could go wrong?
Jail. That could go wrong.
Ya bro it was wild. Hey, is latex digestible?
I can't tell you what you just drank, that would ruin the point of Mystery Monday.
Omg. I felt like a crazed animal last night. My lesbian instincts burned a hole in my panties.
Im breaking out the trunk vodka tonight, its been aged to perfection.
I see you met someone special
My aunt left me alone with the instructions to "get waisted" by the time she returns. I love drunk aunt.
I'm going to get old and fat one day... probably pretty soon and I'm not going to have any pictures to show to my cats of what I once looked like.
Fuck you and your widespread penis snapchat
Its my nipple ring piercing anniversary. We need to celebrate.
I cannot believe all 4 of us had sex at the same time, in the same bed... And it didn't turn into a foursome..
who gets drunk at chipotle by noon and then gets kicked out? this chick.
Randomize
