It was so romantic--he turned me around to face the sunset during doggy-style over the couch back.
The only comparison I have for the iPhone is that it's like youre constantly getting a blow job
I remember your 21st ending with me driving you home while you insisted making bicycle signals out the car window.
I just saw that cheerleader from u of arkansas that I hooked up with over spring break on espn. My parents would be so proud.
I may or may not have just sent the bartender a pic of me in my slutty cheerleader costume with the caption "rah rah ree, gimme yo d"
because drunk making out is frowned upon in museums i think
They were picking gravel out of my face for an hour. I think I took more out of the road than the road did of me.
Barfights against pavement aren't genrally won by people. Props.
I wouldn't blame my organs if they just decided to quit working after this weekend
I also got a mission for you and you're gonna love it. Biggest. Hospital. Party. Ever.
In the mean time, I'll continue to kick ass at running and become a successful stripper while he might hook up with one average looking girl he met at a club. I so win.
Not sure if creeper guy is too drunk to talk or I'm too high to listen.
Other than unclothed paranormal encounters, how has your day been
You know I was thinking and I've never seen a penis in a whirlpool before
gave up morals for lent, so far it's actually been really easy.
Maybe for you. You don't have to clean the melted butter off the stove. I LOST THE SPECIAL SEASONINGS.
Randomize