In regards to your tweet: as its been said on all of those posters on ffffound: keep calm and carry on
I just realized I had sex more when i looked like a fat elton john. Fuck my life.
ah, there's nothing like waking up to picture messages of a strange man's cock. life is good.
haha, that's fucked up. flacid cock pictures are the mental breakfast of champions.
Its mothers day and I have choke marks around my neck. Thanks for that.
dude, i turned on the light and asked if they were ok and they STILL didn't stop. Most determined sex EVER.
I feel like someone kicked me repeatedly in the ribs. I don't think sex is supposed to do that.
I'll answer your question with a question: Are you gonna be too high?
Right now he's sitting in the chair pointing to me to go away. He's trying to have quiet time with his penis.
I'm a professor! I can't be caught chasing the liquor with you hooligans once the undergrads have seen my face
I woke up in a chipotle parking lot with an industrial sized box of condoms and a bag of dounut holes. I need Jesus
Sexual favors are the only currency recognized by the Republic of Greg
Doing the walk of shame from the back of a Jeep to the porta potty it's parked next to while your dad watches is not what you want.
Banged a guy with 2 broken arms once. Top that
as a guy is it bad that even my mom called me easy?
At what point did i decide poptarts, nyquil, and whiskey was a good idea?
Randomize
