Remember when we were trying to guess how many people could fit in my shower? The answer is 7
I think vodka calistinics prior to and during beer olympics was a bad idea
Dude give me 4 good reasons we shouldn't trade girlfriends tonight
Just so you know, a true one night stands ends with a 7 minute blow job after eating a sandwich she made for you while the taxi you called for her comes
I was pissed last night bc this girl didn't want to have sex but offered to reimburse me for the condoms. That just made me upset
My favorite part was screaming to all my life by kc and jojo and just horribly failing
That is was cool to fuck the single mother accross the street until every girl i bring home gets the car keyed.
On one hand it was kinda weird his girlfriends stuff was at his apartment. On the other hand it was kinda nice because she had great shampoo
fuck that its my house. if i want to take 1 bite out of the chicken & leave the rest i fucking will. suck my dick
It's the warm chocolate goeyness of a brownie combined with the heavenly taste of weed-smell... Why have I never done this before?
The highlight was when a stranger was nose to nose with you threatening to kick ur ass, and you said "Is that your real face? Stopped him dead.
Definitely just threw up in a mcds cup going through Wendy's drive thru. I'm way to hungover to go to work today
Has anyone heard from Jamie or has she actually just been having sex for 48 hours?
I think I'm so comfortable in my sexual relationship because he mostly wants to see me naked with large plates of bacon tastefully placed upon my body
Like I said, all hypothetical...unless, of course, you'd be into that. My heart may skip a beat.
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