Just saw truck nuts on a handicap conversion van
you googled "nude photos of celebrities you wouldn't expect to have nude photos", puked into the beer bong, and then laughed
we need 14,000 post its to execute this plan
When I look at old family photos I know how jessica simpson feels when she watches dukes of hazzard
He tried to write down the address for the cab on half a bagel.
That's cause you yelled across the parking lot you wanted to eat her out
Every time I try to stand up the back of my head feels like a bunch of little elves are beating the inside of my scalp with their toy making tools. What disease could this be?
Should I have a moral quandary about Skyping topless with him while his son slept in the other room?
It has moved into the cliche "thin line between love and hate" real quick. With her. Not Taco Bell.
I got my nipples pierced. If you haven't seen my boobs in the past week, you're among the minority
I think John will remember that birthday for a while. I'm still dying at the fact a stripper was hunting me down.
Sitting naked in my bed eating leftover Mexican food drinking coors light.. Can it get any more single than this?
My yoga ball is now going to be used for actual exercise instead of somewhere to suction cup a dildo
the wedding party just walked in to the song eye of the tiger. i'm getting drunk.
Just a reminder- you dropped broccoli in my car and then felt bad for it and named him Henry
I know. I miss henry.
Randomize
