We will have to stop frequently for food, stretching legs, interesting things on the side of the road, and sex. So you might as well eat.
And i was thinking, 'i'm happy to be underneath you, but i wish you weren't doing THAT.'
He just seriously used the word "skeet." Can we please find another way to get weed?
No. Take one for the team.
ii just google-imaged 'sad turtle' and maggie gyllenhaal only came up once. what is the world coming to?
There is no way I'm taking advice from somone who's idea of a balanced diet consists of vodka and lemon detox juice
He was a bulldog and my face was like rare meat. Never again with the drunken ones.
She just hopped out of the car at a red light to pet the baby Jesus in the nativity scene.
Not worth it.
Couple of things: my nipples are blue and knowing that at some point I'm going to have to poop is incredibly terrifying
I can dream in two languages, but it's still about ripping a bong.
Trying to roll joints on a seadoo in the middle of a lake on a windy night. -Juststonerthings
I got into the shower with my underwear on. I just sat down in the tub and tried to figure out when I lost all control of this hangover.
Sorry, I was watching the Olympic story about the Canadian guy and drinking out of the prescription bottle and crying because it was so beautiful.
You shouldn't play strip poker when you're having a wet fart kind of day.
We woke up on vday and got high and played frisbee in our living room for a couple hours and then had sex. It was probably the most romantic valentine's day i've ever had
Somehow, you looked so classy chugging that bottle of wine last night.
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